To The Newlyweds
One of our dearly loved ones recently married. I wrote them a note of encouragement and shared some things I've learned about marriage. After I sent it I thought, 'hey, I should ask some friends to share their thoughts also', wisdom in a multitude of counselors and all of that... so I did!
I posed the following question on Facebook and below you will find the thoughts of my friends and relatives.
But there's so much more to it, so much that I didn't understand, or consider, or know to consider. It's hard. I didn't think it would be. It's beautiful and wonderful and hard. No one told me that part.
The thing about two becoming one is that they are not ever one again. When you marry, when you give yourself to someone and they give their self to you, it all gets mixed up and divided out into two again but each one is now part of the other one and its like mixing red paint and white paint and getting pink paint. You can divvy that pink paint up into two parts again but it will still be two cans of pink paint. It will never be a can of red and a can of white ever again. That's how it should be. It's God's plan and His plans are perfect.
But no one told me that part. As a wife I understood it but as a Mama, I didn't even think about it. The implications it would have on me, my child, my other children, my family dynamics.
It's not a bad thing, I'm not saying that. I'm just saying I never thought about it from this side of the porch, ya know?
So it takes some reevaluating, it takes some learning to understand this different person, this pink person. It takes seeing how the red helps the white to be the best pink ever! It takes realizing your red child is now your pink child and there's another new pink child to envelope and love.
And pink is a lovely color after all.